【質問 No. 24323】 英文要約の添削依頼 |
zoro |
2024-03-12 12:38:01 |
おはようございます。本日も、要約の添削を、お願い致します。
Poyang Lake is China’s biggest freshwater lake. Although people have fished it for generations, these days, a new resource is being removed – sand. Up to 10000 tons of sand are dug up from the lake floor per hour, making this the world’s largest sand mine. Much of the sand is shipped to Shanghai – a city whose population has risen by 7 million since 2008 – where it is used in the construction of high-rises, roads and other structures. Massive mining operations exist not only in China but also in other nations, including Australia and the United States. Globally, the largest importer of sand is Singapore. Which has used the resource to increase its territorial landmass by 20 square miles.
The consequences of sand mining are a major concern. Removing sand from water bodies increases water sediment, blocking out sunlight; this interferes with underwater plants’ production of oxygen, making survival for fish and other organisms difficult. In the case of Poyang Lake, sand removal has made the channels leading out of the lake much deeper and wider, doubling the amount of water flowing outward. Consequently, the lake’s water level had dropped dramatically. This threatens the water supply to neighboring wetlands, which are home to numerous bird species and other wildlife.
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【回答】
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Many countries are becoming increasingly aware of the damage caused by sand mining. Demand for the resource has taken a toll on Indonesia, and Cambodia, which have banned sand exports in efforts to preserve local ecosystems. However, increasing demand means that when mining stops in one area, other areas take on the burden of supply. China’s Yangtze River, for example, was formerly a major sand-mining site, but by the late 1990s so much had been removed that bridges collapsed along with large sections of the riverbank. When sand mining was banned on the Yangtze in 2000, operations shifted to Poyang Lake.
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[解答](要約) Recently, a huge amount of sand is being <digged>(→dug up) in Poyang Lake, China’s biggest freshwater lake, where people have fished <there>(→削除) for <generation>(→generations). <The>(→It's the) world’s largest sand mine <is made>(→削除), and <its' material>(→the sand) is used <in mainly>(→mainly in) Singapore. However, <A>(→a) major problem <sand mining occurred>(→caused by sand mining) led to various problems, <preventing>(→such as preventing) fish and other organisms from <being survive>(→surviving). Although some countries ban sand exports in order to protect local ecosystems, increasing demand for sand in <an>(→削除) concentrated <area>(→areas) caused a lot of problems. For example, in <Yangtze>(→the Yangtze) River, there occurred <the>(→an) accident <that bridges>(→that collapsed) <along with>(→削除) large sections of the riverbank <collapsed>(→削除).
文章が長く、どうしても、書いてあることを無視をするような形になってしまいます。量をたくさんこなして、様子を見るしかないようです。本日も、よろしくお願い致します。
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「回答」(感想): 今回のように、長い文章を要約する場合には、原文の言葉に、あまりとらわれずに、自分の言葉で、その要点を書くことが大事です。その意味で、今回の要約も、うまくできていると思います。慣れるにつれて、要領がつかめるようになる、と思います。Practice makes perfect. の精神で、続けてください。
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